Boost Your Confidence and Boost Your Health | Ep 135

Melissa Deally: 00:00:06

Imagine getting up every day full of energy is if you were in your 20s. Again, what would that be like?

Melissa Deally: 00:00:11

What would that be worth to you? What is your health worth to you? Think about it. Your health isn't everything. But without it, everything else is nothing. And yet too many of us are taking it for granted until something goes wrong. No one wakes up hoping to be diagnosed with a disease or chronic illness. And yet, we've never been taught how to be proactive in our health through our school system, or public health. As a registered health coach and integrative health practitioner, I believe it is time this information is made available to everyone. Combining new knowledge around your health and the ability to do my functional medicine lab tests in the comfort of your own home will allow you to optimize your health for today and all your tomorrow's don't wait for your wake up call. Welcome back to another Podapolooza episode of The don't wait for your wake up call podcast I am here with Elisa Boogaert. Welcome, Alisa.

Melissa Deally: 00:00:16

Hi, thank you so much for having me. It's been so much fun.

Melissa Deally: 00:01:21

It is and I'm super excited to have you here and have this conversation around confidence. But first, I would love for you to share with the audience, how you got into your health coaching work and becoming a confidence coach.

Elisa Boogaert: 00:01:34

Yeah, thanks, everybody. Hi. Yeah, but ELisa Boogaert, transformational speaker and certified health and life coach at Yeah, and I specialize in confidence and my passion is an Wanzer, I'm super passionate to empower people through self confidence to make a change in their lives, so that they can be happy. You know, I really want to help people confidently be themselves so they can put themselves first and then they from there, they can kind of go after what they want in life, I really feel like confidence and being really secure in yourself. And having Self Love is an amazing foundation to have. Because from there, you can do like a you're unstoppable, you can do anything. And throughout the years, I've developed this huge toolkit of ways to increase self confidence that I could choose my own goals, and what I wanted out of my life, and I created the confidence method. So I could coach my clients on these skills and, and help them go after what they want with confidence. And I just, I never want and I have talked to quite a few people about this for they get stumped by the question, what do you want? And I never want anybody gets stumped by that it breaks my heart because because it's just yeah, can be a really difficult question for some people, you know, and I don't want people to be miserable in an area life or, you know, be unhealthy, but feel like they can't make the change or, you know, know what they want to do, but don't feel like they have a confidence to go after it. So it's making my mission to help people with

Melissa Deally: 00:02:58

that. Well, I love what you're doing. And you're right, people often don't know what they want, but they very clearly know what they don't want. And what I know about the power of our unconscious mind is that, where we put our focus we get more of so if we're always focusing on what we don't want, we get more of that. And when we can instead clearly define what we do want. That's what we can then get more of. So I love that you brought that up. And also the fact that you're just working with people and building their confidence. Because once you have the confidence, then that just opens the door to you living your best life. And what many people may not realize is there is actually a connection between being confident, and your health. Because there is a connection between your state or how you feel and your physiology. There's all sorts of research out there that says that, you know, if you're a happy person, you live longer because your immune system is stronger. And this applies to all of the states that we might be in. So if you're a confident person, well guess what confident people are generally happier people too, because they trust in themselves believe in themselves, and they go after what they want. Whereas if you're lacking in confidence, you might be feeling like you don't have a voice or that you're somehow less than and that impacts your physiology weakens your immune system and can cause dis ease in the body. So I love that you are helping people with this. Because in that process of building confidence, you are changing their health outcomes as well.

Elisa Boogaert: 00:04:36

Yeah, it's absolutely true. Like everything's connected, right? Like one thing affects the other thing and like yeah, it's all like the whole mind get all of that is so it's all connected and so you really need to like take care of yourself holistically. And yeah, a lot of what I do as well as about, I'm trying to incorporate into like all of my sessions is stress management as well. Like how can we ask down because that, like if you're in a stress state, you can Oh, what percentage is is it 40% That your digestion is diminished or something like that it's huge, that you actually don't digest as well, because your body is in fight or flight mode, right? It's like exactly,

Melissa Deally: 00:05:09

well, it's not in your gut, if you're in that stress state and in you're in fight or flight digestion is just completely turned off. So there's no enzymes being produced, there is no stomach acid being produced. So you're definitely not digesting your meal. Well, if you are in a stressed out state 100%. Yeah,

Elisa Boogaert: 00:05:25

yeah. And so like, I try to teach people about that, too, like, do a breathing exercise before you eat so that you're relaxed, we can actually get all those nutrient nutrients, and then you'll feel better, you'll have the energy from amazing food you're eating and like, it's all just, it's so connected, and you need

Melissa Deally: 00:05:39

exactly and stress is such a critical factor. I think every single conversation I've had today has brought up stress, because most people are just living in a state of fight or flight. And they look around and they see everyone else just as stressed out, and they normalize it. And they don't realize the impact it has on our long term health and longevity. And yet, 95% of doctor's visits are caused by stress, and 60% of all disease is triggered by stress. And I've actually had a doctor students say to me, I think it's higher than that, that might be an old stat, but even so 60%, right, that's a high number. And so what by addressing the stress, we can change our health outcomes, we improve the health of our gut, because high stress creates an imbalance in the gut, we kill off our good bacteria, and we're left with too much of the bad bacteria. And then that worsens the digestive problems that we just talked about. So I love that you're addressing that stress piece, because it really is critical that it's addressed with every single one of us.

Elisa Boogaert: 00:06:40

Mm hmm. Yeah, really need to do realize that I don't think people are like, Oh, I'm stressed out, I'm just a little bit of stress like, well, you can't have both of your nervous systems on at the same time, right? You the stress response is on or it's not. Right. And so if you're a little bit stressed, then it's on and your body's not working. Yeah, right.

Melissa Deally: 00:06:58

So tell me about you said you developed your toolbox of tools to help with building confidence. So if you don't mind share a couple of the tools that, that you share with your clients to help people regain or build their confidence.

Elisa Boogaert: 00:07:12

Yeah, one of the ones that I do sort of at the beginning of my program is, is about positive self talk and really reframing and like using affirmations. Because again, on that little bit topic of stress, we can get so stressed out right, worrying about what other people might think of bass or we get stressed out, if we don't do something good enough, you know, we're not gonna get something perfect. And we're worried that someone might criticize us, you know, and this can be just such a real inhibitor. And the thing is, is that someone at some point somewhere is going to judge you or criticize you, right? Like, it's impossible to please everybody, because we're all so different. And we all have such different perspectives. So because what you might see is perfect, I may not see it the same way. Because we're just, we're just different, right? And it's likely also know that you're going to judge yourself even harder. And this can be more painful, because we have a lot of those negative self talk right all the time in our head, happens all the time, we get in these ruts. So when these judgments come up, or you're like resisting an imperfection, or maybe you're about to give up on something and you're worried about someone who I would say it really, that my tool that I use for this is to try to catch it in the moment. So like, notice that it's happening, and really like acknowledge it and see it and feel it because the feeling is real right then in there, and then get curious about it and almost challenge it and ask if the judgments are really true. And then see if you can flip it into something that's more, more positive and more compassionate and more loving towards yourself. And then this can be done by creating an affirmation for it so that next time it comes out, you can process it and then have a more positive way of speaking to yourself. Yeah, so like, an example could be I'm trying to think of one with health, but yeah, like, also example, like, I'm a runner, and I love to run, but when people start running, they might be like, oh, like, I'm not a runner, I can't run, I can't even run for five minutes, you know, I suck this, I won't even bother trying. And maybe they could just say, you know, I'm learning as I go, you know, I have what I need to succeed in order to run you know, it's okay to take it slow. Maybe I'm exactly where I need to be, you know, I am a, I could be a strong runner. I'm learning to be a strong runner, as opposed to all that negative things that you say to yourself.

Melissa Deally: 00:09:34

I agree. 100% There's so many ways that we can turn around those thoughts and we have 70,000 thoughts in our head every single day. And when I get into my hypnotherapy work, I often will ask, you know, What trends are you in? Are you in the trance of I can't Are you in the trance of how can i and it also comes back to that children's book, Little Engine That Could I think I can I think I can I think I can't get up the hill right? As well as is, my favorite thing is by Henry Ford, whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right. When it comes to your body's ability to heal, if you think you can heal, your body can heal. If you think you can't guess what it won't. It is as simple as that. So the thoughts that we have in our head, are so impactful on our outcomes in any aspect of our life, in our work, and our health, and our marriage, and our finances, et cetera, et cetera. And so I love what you're doing, because you're creating awareness for people. So many of these thoughts are unconscious. And then they've been there since we were in that zero to six age group, right. And we've just repeated them and repeated them so many times throughout our life. But as we start to build awareness, we can stop saying them and as you say, we can start turning it around and making it something that's more positive, etc. So I love that because it's something that is absolutely free. It's you can do it anywhere, anytime. You just have to have the awareness to start catching yourself. Yes, yes. And I know he's got a trick that way. Are you a practitioner or a coach listening to this? If so, I would love to ask you. Do you use hypnotherapy? In your practice working with clients? And if not, would you like to the power of hypnotherapy is limitless. And so often we experience our clients struggling to reach their goals. It's because they're coming up against their own brick walls and getting stuck, that you can help them through the power of hypnosis, break through all of that, working with their unconscious mind, to put the suggestions in, to have them taking the action to achieve the results that they want. They are thrilled with your coaching techniques, they're getting the results they want, you feel amazing, because you are helping your client get the results they want is a win win. And another win is that it's an added revenue stream for you in your business. So if you like the feel of helping your clients get the results they want. If you liked the sound of that, then definitely reach out Melissa at your guided health journey.com or click the link tree link below for my unlimited power of hypnosis class. To learn more. It's a weekend designation program that I teach valid in 42 countries, you write an exam after taking the experiential course. And you can be admitted to the American Board of hypnotherapy and start using hypnotherapy one to one with your clients and have them achieving the results they want.

Melissa Deally: 00:12:51

For me, I had to learn this to write and I started learning it about eight years ago when I got into health coaching school and realized, wow, look at how I talked to myself and then catching yourself.

Elisa Boogaert: 00:13:03

And you kind of forget about it too sometimes, right? Or if something like maybe you feel like you're doing really well. And you don't talk to yourself as negatively about certain subjects anymore. And then something happens. And you get triggered and you're like, Oh, you're like, oh, like how long have you been thinking about this for like, oh man may have been minutes or I don't know how long it's come up. And this is ruminating in my head like wool. Okay, let's sit down and have a little, let's process this, let's get out of this circuit this like, repetitive circle, it's happening.

Melissa Deally: 00:13:32

Exactly. And so you know, we get triggered, we go back to old patterns, and then we can get back on track, again, with the awareness of where we're going with that. So yeah, I love it. When I work with clients, I'm working with the four bodies, and I'm working on detoxing the four bodies. So we detox the physical body and give it a complete reset get the liver functioning properly. Again, we detox the emotional body because we have so many stuffed down emotions that society has taught us not to feel. And then we have the mental toxicity. And that's this conversation that we're having here is it is toxic to our health to be constantly focusing on these thoughts. And instead to switch it around and focus on the positive focus on what we do want, focus on what we can do, et cetera. And then we have spiritual toxicity too, that needs to be addressed. And that's how we get to true healing is when we address it in all four bodies. So I absolutely love the work that you're doing. Is there any other tool in your toolbox that you'd love to share with us?

Elisa Boogaert: 00:14:33

One of the things that can be really important especially as like, like you were just describing your program and what you teach people you know, as you're starting to change and evolve in that, that can kind of force some relationships to shift in your life and and sometimes people when they see us embark on this they can do to him maybe sometimes they can they can make negative comments about it maybe or they can kind of unconscious They hope that we fail. And then we might feel guilty that they feel threatened by it. So we're gonna sabotage our own goals or lifestyle, because we want to be accepted by them. Because we all want love, safety and belonging, right? There's like the three major things that we want in life. And so this is really just the perfect opportunity to set a boundary, which is what I like to one of my tools I like to teach people is about that, you know, how can you set these boundaries to tell people like, No, this is really important to me, this is why I'm going on this journey. And we also need to know that it's, it's not our fault, like, it's not your fault, that they feel bad, that you're not responsible for their experience of you shifting your life and becoming healthier and all these different four areas, right. And I know, yeah, that this can this was true for me when I am I lived abroad for 11 years. And when I would come home every year, but always be like, Oh, When are you moving home, when you moving home, you know, or when I would come visit, I always felt like it wasn't good enough, you know, I got it didn't spend enough time with somebody or I didn't like I felt that there was a lot of sort of negativity around it, you know, and I thought that it was really like appreciating the fact that I was taking two or three weeks of my year to buy halfway across the world to see them. And so I thought it was something that I wanted to do. So it was like a perfect time to set that boundary. And that it's, it's really very healthy, to uphold your boundaries, and allow other people to have their experience of that. And so the communication tool that I really like to to use is maybe let people know why it's important to you like why you're embarking on this journey, or that you're doing it and why it's important to you. And sometimes you might need to explain to them several times, right. But if you can do it in a in a kind and assertive and respectful way that they'll eventually come around. So if they try to make you feel bad or anything like that, the communication tool is that you, you acknowledge them, and what they might want. And then you explain how you feel and what you want. So this way you, no one really like gets defensive everything like you see them, you hear them and like I hear your concern, and I get it, but I'm going to stay like they're going to my goals. This is what I'm doing. I'm not going to let you kind of swayed me off track. And I know like one way, like I think a lot of things well, getting healthier. Maybe people want to say like drink less alcohol or something like that, right? So if you're used to the person, everybody's like, hey, yeah, like I call you when I want to go up for a drink, or you're kind of used to this habit of being social. For the communication tool, say someone invites you out, you can be like, going out for a drink, you know, after work tonight sounds really fun, right? So you acknowledge them like they might want and you're like, Well, I've got like an early morning meeting. So I can stay in tonight, or I'm really focusing on my health right now. Or, you know, I need to go training for my half marathon. So it's really important that I that I do that tonight, we just sort of that that's just a way of setting that boundary being like, Thank you. Yes, I agree, that would be great. I'm gonna do this.

Melissa Deally: 00:18:08

I love that. And it's so true that people will often unwittingly try to talk you out of whatever it is that you're doing that's different, because they want everything to stay the same. They love you as you are right. And so they don't mean any harm by it, but they're not you and they don't have the same dreams and goals and abilities that you do. And so it is so important to be able to set the boundaries around what it is that you want. And back to the very beginning of this whole podcast, be clear on what you want, so that you can do that. And gently let people know that you're gonna stay in your lane, they get to stay in their lane. And it might mean that the relationship evolves a little bit. However, that's what you need to do for you to stay aligned with yourself, which is part of what allows you to live in a place of optimal health is when there's misalignment that dis ease sets in. So thank you for sharing all of that. I love these tools. And those are just a few of the many that you have available to you. So I love it. And tell me Elisa, what does don't wait for your wake up call mean to you.

Elisa Boogaert: 00:19:18

I experienced this as I was kind of growing up by and I have a huge mixed international family that is a bit older. And so as I grew up, I lost five grandparents because it was like there's many marriages throughout my teenage years and then my mom got breast cancer when I was in my 20s. And one of my managers I was very close with she she died of a stroke suddenly my best friend died of brain cancer at the age of 23. And I lost my dad to colon cancer and he died at the age of 46. And so Looking at this, like it made me it was, it was a wake up call seeing all of this and made me really realize that life is short, you know, and I want to live life to the fullest. And this is exactly what I did, I sort of center my life around fun. And I did that traveling, and I went abroad, and which was great, you know, in my 20s. But then as I hit my 30s, I kind of realized that the way I was living my life, though, with a lot of fun, it wasn't the healthiest. And I started to get a bit concerned about getting older, and then looking at my health, and I looked back at my my father's death and knew that his death was preventable, you know, he didn't really take care of himself that much he didn't eat right, he didn't exercise. And so she got older, he had like, everyone in the car accidents, we got back pain, which kind of inhibited him it was kind of was the beginning of the end. And he would have late nights and didn't have good quality sleep, you know, and I made the same reflections with my manager as well. And even my mom and those who was a survivor, it kind of came to the same conclusion that like could their illnesses, and their loss of their lives been preventable. And I had to really stop and be have an honest conversation with myself that if I didn't change, I might have that same fate. And so I started to own my own sort of like healthy lifestyle evolution really sort of empowered myself to have my best life and start being more healthy. And so I think that's what the wake up call means to me that I through them, I learned through them well to have that with myself. And I knew that I had to change.

Melissa Deally: 00:21:36

I love that you've chosen life, you've chosen your health, and your health really is your greatest asset without your health, what have you got, right? You can't build a business from your sick bed, you can't raise your family at cetera, et cetera. And so I love that mindset shift that you took upon yourself. And that's something that a message that I love to share with other people is to just revisit what their health means to them, stop taking it for granted and start choosing to make it a priority. Yes. How can people get ahold of you? Elisa, if they would like to know more work with you?

Elisa Boogaert: 00:22:09

Yes, my website is inspiration by elisa.com. And same on like Instagram, or Facebook, it's at inspiration by Elisa and on my website, you can see my, my programs and even book a session with me to talk about, you know, what you want for your life and your confidence and see if the program is a good fit.

Melissa Deally: 00:22:30

Wonderful. Well, I'll make sure all of that is in the show notes. And is there any last tip you would like to leave the audience.

Elisa Boogaert: 00:22:36

Um, I would just say that, you know, as you start to, or as you're on your health journey to realize that change takes time, and to be patient and kind with yourself, and that, you know, it's never too late. And if you do kind of fall off the health wagon, you can always get back on and you get that support. And that accountability will really help you with that. And be kind to yourself, it's okay. It'll take time and it takes you as long as it's going to take you.

Melissa Deally: 00:23:06

And you're always exactly where you're supposed to be. So I love that. Thank you for coming on the show today and sharing all of your wisdom, Alyssa, and anybody who's listening, thank you for tuning in and listening. And please share this with anybody who you feel needs to hear Elise's message.

Melissa Deally: 00:23:22

This idea of having me very welcome thank you for investing this time with me on the don't wait for your wake up call Podcast. I'm so glad you joined in. If you can take two minutes to share this episode with someone who you think can benefit and have a positive impact on their life. That would be wonderful. Please leave a review by going to your favorite podcast listening app. And let me know what you enjoy or would like to hear more of it will support me in my effort to bring the possibility of natural healing to a wider audience and help disrupt the sick care system we have today and make human health a global priority. Health is your true wealth.